Wednesday, April 19, 2006

A new direction

I hope you all had a pleasant Easter, mine was amazing. I had dinner at my family on Saturday and the DH’s family on Sunday. Throw in church, I seemed to be there a lot, and some good family time and you have it a most excellent Easter weekend. I love love love 4 day weekends, three day weekends are nice but four is the perfect length. If I ever become independently wealthy I think I will make every weekend a four day weekend, and then I come crashing back to reality and realise that I would just start whining for five day weekends if every weekend was four days. Oh Bean always striving!

I am sure I am not alone when I say I ate way too much and I sure hope I am not alone when I say I enjoyed every bite!

I have decided to shift my focus from what I am eating to why I am eating. I am sure that this will send some of the people that peek in here packing, but hey this blog is for me so if you are staying yeah and if you are not don’t forget t check in once and a while!

I am so fed up with the whole thing. I was trying to explain to my cube farm friend, why I am giving up Weight Watchers. I have had weight loss surgery and I am still obese. Something is obviously more deep seeded than just food and liking to eat jelly beans. Maybe it is a sugar addiction, maybe it is trying to fill a void, although my life seems very complete right now, maybe it is rebellion, but here is what I plan on doing about it…

Ready… I’m giving it over to God. I am made in His likeness and I am His child, so the problem is HIS to deal with. I have tried everything in my power, so now it is time for Him to display His power. I fully expect and have faith that healing will occur. I am keeping up the ticker and will weigh in on the 1st and 15th of the month. Now don’t get me wrong, I don’t expect to eat my face off and lose weight, I expect healing from the pain and hurts and problems that cause me to stuff and turn to food. I will do my part, because God helps those who help themselves. When I am binging, I will pray, I will cut back on the sugar and seek guidance through prayer and counselling.

It has become so obvious to me the freedom I have in God. I have been fighting it my whole life and now that I have surrendered and have decided to let God be the centre focus of my life, I feel so free, happy, content and complete. And I believe that God will make me better. I can do all things through Christ, who strengthens me. Philippians 4:13.

If realize this may be too out there for some of you, but I will not apologize for loving and believing in God. This is not religion I am taking about, this is a living God who I am developing an awesome relationship with. If you decide to leave, good luck and God bless, if you stay it may prove to be an interesting run.

Love you all.



Blogger Quizz Coach said...

You are not alone in your struggles...all God's best.

1:45 PM  
Blogger ~Les said...

I'm staying. I fully understand your struggles and your plan, and I wish you all the very best in your new direction, Ms. Bean!


2:59 PM  
Blogger Kim said...

I'm happy to hear that you had such a nice weekend! I am also excited for you and your new attitude. Best wishes to you!!

5:12 PM  
Blogger snackiepoo said...

I actually TOTALLY believe in figuring out why you eat rather than what you eat because that is the root of all the drama fest binging and other stuff that makes us pig out.

Bless you and good luck!

9:20 AM  

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